Man The Helm 2 - August 9th-13th - Arrrhhaaa

ps ah'm qwite possh in reel lyfe 😋😋😋😋😋😋

lesslie wils, tthah uglee unkle Sandwitch is a retchin' an' thorerly unplessant chappie wi' septick blackheds been 'is mane feetchur. I wudnt trust'im wi'ma collecshun o' yoused tow nayles. plusss yuh Inglish is abhismall tuh sae the leest wench

bimmblee thah art a snivlin' crawler o' t'wurst kin' . if yuh thinck tha' thah bee partee tuh the plott thah art eeven stuupidder than wee thort. Harrrrrr, thy blubberee , poc-fillled feetchures wil soon be mixxin' it wi' fosils on see bed. enjoy thah las' sleeep tunite. a nytemare beckons fuh yuh wench

Sir Gezzer, my whole body is shaking with shock yes shock Brimbull has lost the plot i feel her bobbley slacks has reduced nay stopped the blood supply to her last brain cell. She has no idea that I do not touch bread and let alone the fact that s/he is taking my uncle Sandwiches name in vain. Meaning less to her maybe, as she grovels for her position with total disregard for PDS (he'll have his revenge mark my words bimbully!) but as you can plainly see she cannot write Qweens Engolosh yours Commi-o-dear Wills

ps ah can smel mos'of yuh from wear ah sit

bimmblee thar art ded meet, wils isa mayte o' mine an' no-on an' ah repeet no-on inshults me maytes ...thar disgize on fryday'ad beta be a gud 'un thah weesley towed wi froggs leggs

see wench??? HEH heh heh ..tings ar luckin'up

Tc thar bee wel advised tuh keep thah tong stil wilst it stil in yah gob

TMIW - wot'as ma insultts tu du wi' tha' smeelee???? go an' mold

Bloorae thou playst wi' fyre. Oi 'ave memry o' afrikan skunk

There's definitely going to be some demotions & premotions. Plus a court martial. The admiratly has created a new crew position above the bilge boy but below the poop deck scrupper of: Seawench😀

This is so funny. Am convinced Carpe Diem has been in character since they set sail last year.

😈😈😈😈
Don't worry Blueray, they don't let him out of the assylum very often :~😈😈😋

Oh no TMiW!!

Hmmm......site admin......I'm begging you to please delete my last post before I perish ☹

Actually Blueray I know that sea dog and if I were you I'd be very afraid!!! :~😈😈😋 Be thankful you're not doing that weekend now!

OMG, I'm not even going and I'm getting abuse lol!
Anyone can be brave when they're hiding behind a keyboard. Your cards are marked Carpe Diem - be afraid!!

Bueray thou art a snivelin' layaoboutt tuh laze tuh erect mast or de-wurm plancks, yuh nayme wil be memurizzed fuh fewchur excurshuns

Grrrrr...why did I cancel?!
I'm sure you'll all have a great time. I'm not jealous - honest!!

eey bimblee dinna ye ken tha' we pyrates can snif a cabbin lassy 10 leegs awa'? Tha's nae chance of hidin' strapin' or t'other stuf. An' as fuh yuh "whip" Wilsy yuh playin' wi' fire if yuh be seen wi' that. Yuh own medisin wil becon and yuh weels and boyls wil know nae bownds. Crimpleen wil be rippped on furst evnin'. bimblee u 'as bumbled yuh last

Ha ha booble free is of course what we all are as no lassies shall sail on this ship bad luck they do say. But I feel Warrant officer Spring has shown her true colours not knowing what she supposed to be doing hope she can strap herself well and truly down. I'm sure your bewitchin ways will work wonders! I myself am keeping to the sea code of conduct leaving the beguilin to others,......Commodore's are better at shouting and whipping which I must admit is more my style. I'm sure either of our tactics will work for this motley crew that we share this voyage with. Packing whip as I type along with my lovely crimplene blouse flat size :~😉😉

Oh bimbley are you psychic? re:- crimplene blouse,... spooky or what... I have just had one made and given too me by my personal dresser John Forbes for this this very occasion, blue of course.
As for this poop hornswaggler it is now his fate to be Keelhauled then if repentant or not in Davy Jones Locker a just punshment of careen with some caulking if needed or a 1000 lines of 'I am a land lubber' . Sir Gezzer,..... he that must be obeyed grovel, grovel, will rubber stamp this Im sure.....looking forward to seeing the elasticated trousers booble free of course,... including yourself🙂🙂🙂

bimbly I 'ave seeen les drivell at t'botom o' drayns than spoutss outa thy smellee muoth. Yuh ar waigh outa yuh dpth 'an wil regrett yuh filffy jybes. I 'ate yuh an' I 'ate yuh greesy slacs witch iwil enjoy stuffin' wear sun dinna shyne. An' as for Willis - she is unfitt to wype muck offa yuh boots an' wil bee promoted ova me ded bodie. Bimmblies yuh wil soon bee monein' an' pathetickly beggin' fo mersy haaarrrrrhhhhh grrrrrrrrrrrrr hah

yuh wil be stufed ruffly insyde thows polly esta slacs for yuh dangling tyme Willis. Las' bod hoo tryd shacklin' me was inpeeses soon afer, lil greesie 'uns. Yuh need tu be tort an unplesunt lesun, jus' say bie to yuh mates afore yuh cum to Windymeer tuh meat thy maka heh heh heh (ive spied yuh unyformm an' its no a pretty site su dinnae git exsited...)ps bimbledee sownds lyke a rite sof-arrrsed wimp

Poop deck blubber....I feel your threats of dangling me from said mast are a tad OTT ...."unless video rights are sorted and the revenue from the film goes to the cost of my new uniform taylor made of course'. There will be no!.. yes no!! rum or G&T on deck. Sir Geyser has taken the right steps by having you shackled to the lower decks, for the safety of all.
Poor cabin boy bimmbley has brought a lovely pair of bobble free polyester slacks to wear on deck and now feels cheated having the threat of no legs.☹

Wils - yuh misjuged insults wil Hornt you threwout yur misrabul voy-age. me roth wil no no bounds wonse yu ar owlin' in pane an'danglin'from t'mast. Lyke I sed methinks yuh wil find mah statchur on bord wil be grayter than Stir Guzzer can imadgin. I am ful of deeply unpleasant suprises ahhhrrrrrrrrrrrr

Cluair Bulble you be excetshunally foolish to tinker wi me... as for boots yah wont be nedin''em when you wobblin' round on yah torso wondrin' where yuh legs went. Jus' bewher the limpin' dwarf......Memrabul? HArr hArr ..yYURE trip'll bee exseedinly breef Bumbble..

EEK Stargazer...Just seen I am down as Gunner...Won't be arriving until Friday evening, can you manage without a Gunner for Friday!!! I am camping so will see the other campers Friday evening and others walking Saturday.🙂🙂🙂😉

Ha ha ha - looking forward to hear all he shenanigans from this weekend!

Who is this captain Jack Sparrow? I dont see his name on the list is he the celebrity guest? and if so letting our venance out on the poor guy seems very unchivaless. Much better to take it out the lowest of low!... oh who can that be, let me just check the list....... oh yes poop deck scrubber !!! he,he😀😀:

We can all let out our vengance on Captain Jack Sparrow, when we track down & board the Black Pearl🙂 Arrrhhaaa

What have you let yourself in for Chris???!!!! 😮😮:~:~

This sounds like it could be mayhem and murder this weekend. Part of me is slightly relieved I can't make it, Don't sink the boat though as I hope to make it another time! :~🙂😋

eh, Guzzer, yoo'v skiped yuh last...

Clare bimmbl - thah scrawnee nec is attrctin mah unwantted atenshun.... be very afrayed...CD

poops dec scruber%&??*** POOPS DEC SCRUBER???&&%%$$** Shiva me timbbers Starr Guzzer! Ma ransid, puss-filled ganngreen is curddlin' wif unbridled fury at t'insulting ma heredirtry and creduntials. u 'ave made gravous eror - the putrid, splurrgin' juuises o'yuh poxy carcarse will soon be staynin' yuh previuss jolly "Rodger" as stench o'yuh inards wafts acros t'open bows an' I resoom mah ritefull playce at t'helm. a stinkckin' mootiny is afoot (witch is a lim yuh wil soon lac). I 'ope Ah've maid me sel' clear Guzzer me 'earty..............CHEEF ADmral CARPE x aaaarrrrrrrrrrrrhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh

See invite🙂
THE CREW & OFFICERS
Discipline is vital at sea so we need to have rankings if we are to plunder & pillage well.
Admiral – Chris50
Commodore – Lesley Wills & her commissioned officers
1st Lieutenant – Catwalker
2nd Lieutenant – KateB
Commander-Hillmale
Skipper-Stargazer
Quartermaster-Alpine Hiker
Purser- Beatrix (to collect £5 donations for ship costs)
Navigator- Adventure Rick
Ist Flag Officer- Goingforgold
Boatswain-Lizzied
Master At Arms-Liz
Major-Jw19
Warrant Officer-Spring
Barsteward-Lovelifegirl
Wren-Eddie
Gunner-Corrie
1st Ableseaman-Molley
Ableseaman-46 Years old
Cabin Boy-Bimble (Claire)
Poop Deck Scrubber-Carpe Diem

So Bimble you are now the official Cabin Boy. Ranked only above the Bilge Boy🙂
**** This invitation is full over the weekend ****

Poopdeck scrubber....hmmm....I'm being very restrained here cat...but I don't know how ling it'll last....
I'm dropping the kids off at their mums on the Sunday..so might pop up for a few days.

I am bringing the ingredients for the Gin and tonics!

AH thanks for sorting walk out. You are promoted to Quarter Master🙂

Hi All. The walk on Saturday will begin at 9.30 at the car park on Rydal road just outside Amleside after the mini roundabout.We are going to do Red Screes which is a lovely circular walk with a well earned pint at the Golden Rule pub at the end.Its about 9 miles. Please come equipped for a full days walking in the mountains incl waterproofs,fleece,1.5 litres of water min and a packed lunch. This walk will be at a pace that will suit those coming on the walk it is not intended to be at breakneck speed so that everyone can enjoy a good day out. Molly will be there to round up stragglers.Any questions do get in touch and will try to answer them.I think the car park is £6 for 8 hours.AH

none of these smilies will suffice for the bloody rage within my breast...

you threaten demotion at your peril SG, your memory is short as will be your fingers....grrrrr

The Bilge Boy is already deceased:~

If any body else is interested in being a Pirate please email me directly, as one or two drop outs. For definites please book in YHA ASAP:~

Carpe Diem! The Admiralty takes scaring the crew as insubordination. You have been demoted again to Poop Deck Scrubber🙂

well it's a long, twisted and bloody road to the top. Few of us make it to tell the tale. If your shipmates don't get yuh the rats will....(sorry it's not like this on board, we are posh champagne Charlie's really and only four throats got slashed last year) Just watch your back and whatever you do don't fall asleep on the boat....As some people on this site know I could drivel on like this all night so will go now :~😋😉

don't get too excited CW - last year SG had his 1st Lieutenants de-worming the masts for most of their miserable sojourn aboard...☹

Ha ha, don't forget to pass your parrot to someone else.

For coming back so quickly catwalker you have been promoted to a commissioned officer ie 1st Lieutenant🙂 contratulations!